The Improbot app for Android is now available -- Improbot on Google Play.
Random Dialogue (x 500)
Plug it in here.
Sound the alarm!
If you don't want it, give it to someone who does.
My life is over.
Don't be scared. I just need you to hold your breath
You will always despise me.
Who left a knife in the closet?
This is a fine ship
I see you let yourself in.
I can offer you a job.
You are not my son.
This is the only thing that's made the last five weeks bearable
Your nose has turned black.
It's giving me a headache.
Darling, it's beautiful.
We're ghosts.
It wasn't your fault that you slipped in the driveway.
I know the future.
What will you do, now that you've found a job?
Be safe!
I knew you could fix it.
I bet you know why I'm broke.
Did you eat today?
You are my everything.
Are you kidding me? We're not alone!
Today is the day
This looks edible.
Okay. Just stay calm and look straight ahead.
I want that frog out of my life!
If you're done, we'll get started.
It's time to pack your bags.
I can offer you an icecream.
Hey, watch me leave.
Please, stop doing that.
We need to close it.
I heard a sound coming from the guest room.
A girl needs her grandmother.
I feel ecstatic.
Let's get it
I have faith.
You are an idiot.
This room is bugged.
Take the money and go.
It's your fault that we ran out of chocolate.
We've only got one bullet.
Someone's listening.
I am going to the funeral.
You are the tallest person I have ever met.
The first thing to consider is the cost.
You're going to need a cameraman.
I love winter in Canada.
I volunteer to eat it!
Give me one good reason why I should wear jeans.
You want it.
I want to tell you about the cell.
You said you didn't see your father at all this week.
I have the letter.
No one can ever know what we did.
When I was little, I wanted to be an optometrist.
I can't find my kite anywhere.
Don't get too close.
I hate you.
This is a day to remember
Be better!
You should make peace with your father.
You're lucky.
I'm the only executioner who ever lived.
Thoughts are like marshmallows...
I want you to stop questioning me.
I'll watch.
Stop, in the name of the law.
I'm a ghost.
I just want a sandwich. What's wrong with that?
Your cheeks have turned green.
You crashed the car on purpose.
If you don't want it, throw it away.
I guess you have read the stories about my sister?
Can I make art?
You will always love me.
Did you get lucky while I was away?
Hi De Hi De Hi De Hi.
I've reported it to mother.
This is the only thing that's made the last two weeks possible.
You never listen.
Leave it until morning.
I want you to kill me.
We need to unite.
When the bell rings, put on your clothes.
A girl needs her own room.
What will you do, now that you've completed the mission?
Take this and pray.
Hey, watch me smile.
I never wanted this.
Knitting is good for the soul.
My love, it's so juicy.
Your tongue has turned yellow.
Let's watch the game
She was unconscious when I found her.
Find some proof that he deceived you.
Good night!
I have to tell you about Thursday.
I bet you know why I'm happy.
Am I coming with you, or not?
I'm trying to believe you.
We're going to need a lot of masking tape.
It's giving me hope.
Please, listen to me.
You should vote.
Give me one good reason why I should wear underpants.
I want you to cancel my trip to Germany.
When I was little, I wanted to be a welder.
Don't wait to be asked.
No one can ever know that I like yoghurt
This room is shrinking.
I knew you could live like this.
I know more than you realise.
No one can ever know that I was here.
Open wide and say 'Ah'.
I'm the worst waiter who ever lived.
Winners don't quit
I can offer you a lifetime of happiness.
It's time to make lunch.
If you don't want it, can I have it?
I'm a god.
You angel!
You're coming with me!
I'm going to need a firefighter.
It's not heavy.
I have a secret.
I can't find my can opener anywhere.
I love summer in Switzerland.
I want you to stop following me.
You despise me.
I want that chicken out of my house!
Sorry, I can't do this any more.
It was your fault that you slipped in the driveway.
We're gods.
I'll listen.
Falling in love is like cooking...
I never hurt anybody.
I guess you have read the stories about my father?
He couldn't have arrived at a worse time.
A boy needs his mother.
Be careful!
You are so good to me.
My life is a mystery.
I feel energetic.
You should make peace with your mother.
Can I make mistakes?
Leave it here.
I have the scroll.
You are a poet.
Take this with you.
How dare you smile at me!
I heard a voice coming from the lounge room.
You are the loneliest person I have ever met.
No one can ever know that you can dance.
Friendship is like a mountain...
Mighty oaks from little acorns grow.
You're going to need a lot of friends.
When I was little, I wanted to be a shaman.
You can't have it.
Cooking is not as easy as it looks.
You are not my mother.
Who left an ukulele in the conservatory?
I'm going to need a hammer.
When the bell rings, remain calm.
Hey, watch me with your eyes.
Delivery!
Don't be afraid. I just need you to listen
Did you enjoy yourself this morning?
It's giving me grief.
Get ready to laugh.
Open the curtains.
I'm lucky.
I am going to Easter.
I can't find my espresso anywhere.
I can offer you a spring-roll.
No one can ever know the truth.
Stop, in the name of love.
Don't upset your grandmother, not now.
I'm trying to win.
I just want a shovel. What's wrong with that?
You said you didn't see your mother at all that day.
I want you to be peaceful.
Dreams are like salmon swimming upstream...
You burned it on purpose.
I'll open it.
Good morning!
You could never fascinate me.
Someone's watching us.
Throw me the pickle.
We're going to need an electrician.
Let well alone.
You are the funniest person I have ever met.
It's time to go to bed.
You're going to pay!
I want you to document my trip to Antarctica.
Why do you hate me, so much?
I want you to listen to me.
I will always hate you.
I volunteer as tribute!
You monster!
You're a ghost.
I have the poem.
I'm the only clown on this planet
I bet you know why I'm smiling.
You are my inspiration.
Give me one good reason why I should wear swimmers.
I can't find my house anywhere.
No one can ever know that you survived.
I am shaky.
I want that fox out of my car!
When I was little, I wanted to be a DJ.
We should start a business.
We've only got one chance.
Go and live with your aunt, then! See if I care.
Please, lie down.
Your tongue has turned blue.
This is the only thing that's made the last three days possible.
How dare you look down your nose at me!
She couldn't have arrived at a worse time.
I knew you wouldn't be able to fix it.
I am going to the wedding.
I want to tell you about the grand opening.
This is a fine mess
Don't take 'no' for an answer.
Dancing is all I can manage now.
I want you to stop looking at me.
Open the window.
We're no good.
Hey, watch me dance.
It's better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.
Can I make promises?
Someone's having a bad day.
Are you crazy? We're not 'fine'!
Power is like a river...
My life means nothing.
You are so mean to me.
Your hopes are like spaghetti...
You said you didn't see your mother at all this week.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a sweatshirt.
It was my fault that the wedding was ruined.
I love summer in Canada.
I know who you are.
I'll sit on it.
I want you to join me on my trip to China.
I can offer you a burger.
I'm the greatest cobbler who ever lived.
I bet you know why I'm here.
Time to shine
Am I dead, or not?
Don't upset your sister, not now.
We're going to need a lot of nails.
I heard a noise coming from the guest room.
I just want a kite. What's wrong with that?
Take the money and die.
I see you are thinking.
Show me the spoon.
You're going to need an astronaut.
We should ask for more money.
Take this with water.
You should write to your mother.
It's your fault that we ran out of money.
This looks wrong.
I can offer you a chance to redeem yourself.
Your eyes have turned black.
I want you to be spirited.
She couldn't have left at a worse time.
What will you do, now that you've found your passion?
Your tongue has turned pink.
I'm insignificant.
The first thing to consider is how to get away with it.
When I was little, I wanted to be an athlete.
Please, sit down.
Let's play
A boy needs his space.
This is the only thing that's made the last five months bearable
I am going to Christmas.
Go and live with your uncle, then! See if I care.
Did you eat just now?
Just sitting is not as easy as it looks.
How dare you laugh at me!
I want that yak out of my car!
My love, it's delicious.
You dropped it.
We need to fight.
I love spring in India.
I want you to kiss me.
I heard weeping coming from the kitchen.
Can I make money?
You're going to need a shovel.
Just breathe
Who left a puppy in the living room?
Show me the can opener.
It's not working.
This is a stick up.
Take the piano and leave.
I want to tell you about Thursday.
Okay. Just follow my lead.
I need to tell you about the dungeon.
Sorry, I have to take this.
I can offer you a diet Pepsi.
Open your heart.
I just want a fork. What's wrong with that?
Don't be afraid. I just need you to stop
We've only got one life.
It's time to go.
This is the perfect time to be happy.
I'm trying to open it.
You are the oddest person I have ever met.
I could never hate you.
You are blissful.
You're going to need a private detective.
I want you to be dismayed.
You are not my favourite.
This room is unstable.
Find some proof that I tricked you.
I can offer you a good price.
Please, come closer.
Why do you love me, so much?
You fascinate me.
You're going to need a lot of masking tape.
We're special.
Your ears have turned white.
I've reported it to the press.
When the door opens, remain calm.
Boop-Oop-a-Doop.
My love, it's dead.
Clothes do not make the man.
I feel eager.
I have time.
This looks bad.
Get ready to dance.
You broke it.
You broke the vase on purpose.
I heard a creaking sound coming from the guest room.
He couldn't have left at a worse time.
I volunteer myself!
I should hide.
Leave it to the professionals.
I have the card.
Take the piano and die.
It's not mine.
He was unconscious when I found him.
You never have time for me.
Take this for luck.
A boy needs his friends.
You devil!
I want you to cancel my trip to Japan.
It wasn't my fault that Mum fell down the well.
You said you didn't see your nemesis at all that day.
Go and live with your father, then! See if I care.
Throw me the wrench.
I want that horse out of my life!
I want to tell you about the sniper.
Can I make the team?
I love autumn in China.
Buying a house is like opening a window...
Don't be afraid. I just need you to come with me
We're going to need a principal.
Let's drink
No one can ever know that I like to dance
We need to break up.
You're cursed.
Darling, it's so expensive.
I can offer you a banana.
Death is like a beautiful song...
I'm going to need a lot of help.
I see you smiling.
You are money-minded.
Eating is not as easy as it looks.
This looks familiar.
I want you to stop me.
I knew you wouldn't be able to turn things around.
Did you fart while I was away?
We're the same person.
I feel maternal.
This is the perfect time to be alone.
I heard a creaking sound coming from the attic.
How dare you look at me!
I can't find my camel anywhere.
I want you to stop blaming me.
It's your fault that the boat floated away.
Are you nuts? We're not friends!
No one can ever know how we did it.
This is the only thing that's made the last four days bearable
I need to tell you about Monday.
Please, don't move.
You want me.
I'm the best botanist on this planet
You never smile.
We're alone in the universe.
You're going to need a construction worker.
Sorry, is all that I can say.
It wasn't my fault that your heart got broken.
Someone's coming this way.
Open the bottle.
He couldn't have died at a worse time.
I am going to Thanksgiving.
I have the gun.
Get ready to run.
It's not open.
I can offer you a beer.
I want you to cook for me.
We should pay the bill.
I want you to document my trip to Brazil.
I just want a doll. What's wrong with that?
I despise you.
Take the piano and go.
Go and live with your brother, then! See if I care.
Knitting is one of the great pleasures in life.
The first thing to consider is who's paying.
I want you to be brittle.
Am I under arrest, or not?
You are not my father.
I'm going to need a shovel.
We are competitive.
Did you fart at work?
You are my daughter.
I'm going to need a lot of masking tape.
You will always need me.
Don't be scared. I just need you to go to sleep
I'm crazy.
I want you to stop tickling me.
Sweetheart, it's so shiny.
Why do you tease me, so much?
No one can ever know that I killed him.
Don't upset your brother, not now.
This is the right time to be afraid.
This looks suspicious.
I'm going to need a police officer.
Show no mercy
I know what happened.
It was your fault that Grandpa fell down the stairs.
Running for office is like tidying your room...
Get out while the getting is good.
Your cheeks have turned stripey.
I want that dog out of my room!
I see you came prepared.
It's your fault that the show was cancelled.
When the door opens, make a run for it.
Give me one good reason why I should wear trousers.
I want you to be bored.
I'm the only impersonator on this planet
I just want a plane. What's wrong with that?
I will always love you.
I have the knife.
You know it.
You never do what I want.
Okay, who left a camel in the kitchen?
I've reported it to Interpol.
Life is like a movie...
I love winter in Australia.
You are not my conscience.
We need to order pizza.
This is the worst time to be angry.
This room is haunted.
Don't be afraid. I just need you to think
Stop, in the name of all things holy.
Don't upset your boss, not now.
We're lucky.
No one can ever know that you can fly.
I want you to read to me.
When I was little, I wanted to be a mutant.
We are insulting.
Get ready to die.
I can't find my Coke anywhere.
It's not right.
Are you pulling my leg? We're not invincible!
It wasn't your fault that your heart got broken.
You said you didn't see your husband at all this week.
I never gave up hope.
Open sesame.
You're crazy!
You're a god.
No one can ever know that I am alive.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a coat.
I want that puppy out of my room!
Your cheeks have turned orange.
We're going to need an assassin.
Ha-cha-cha.
You are the most hideous person I have ever met.
I'm trying to see the funny side.
No one can ever know how much this hurts.
Your hopes are like marshmallows...
Your face has turned blue.
When the curtain goes up, whistle like a bird.
I love autumn in Ireland.
You are a handsome devil.
Did you drink 8 glasses of water this morning?
This is the perfect time to be somewhere else.
I could never want you.
I am methodical.
Good luck!
If you're ready, we'll get started.
It's not ready.
If you don't want it, put it back.
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.
When I was little, I wanted to be an alien.
Similes
Comparison of two things, with an ellipsis. Complete the simile by explaining how the two things are alike.
5102050100500More coming soon! Make suggestions on the Improbot Facebook page.