The Improbot app for Android is now available -- Improbot on Google Play.
Random Dialogue (x 500)
I've reported it to mother.
A boy needs discipline.
You broke it.
I can't find my water anywhere.
You are an inspiration.
I knew you wouldn't be able to survive.
It's your fault that we ran out of milk.
Open the bottle.
You should find your father.
We're gods.
Don't be scared. I just need you to stop
It's giving me an error message.
Go and live with your father, then! See if I care.
You're going to need a torturer.
You are so nice to me.
Be careful!
You're going to need a lot of nails.
You burned it on purpose.
I just want a ball. What's wrong with that?
I see you know what to do.
You never listen.
I can offer you a gin and tonic.
What will you do, now that you've eaten?
You're a god.
Can I make the world better?
Sorry, I have to take this.
How dare you laugh at me!
Please, don't drink that.
Show me the ukulele.
I'm the worst real estate agent on this planet
You are not my father.
It's time to pack your bags.
We need to open it.
It's not working.
I want you to betray me.
Sound the alarm!
This room is bugged.
I am going to the party.
Let's play
I want you to document my trip to Ireland.
I bet you know why I'm smiling.
It wasn't your fault that the lights went out.
I want you to stop loving me.
I can offer you a chance to redeem yourself.
Good luck!
He was unconscious when I found him.
I guess you have seen the stories about my uncle?
I want that tortoise out of my room!
I need to tell you about the grand opening.
Thoughts are like marshmallows...
If you don't want it, put it back.
You are the oddest person I have ever met.
Who left a mochaccino in the lobby?
I have needs.
My love, it's so expensive.
When I was little, I wanted to be a magician.
I feel comfortable.
No one can ever know that I survived.
Whoop-whoop.
I know what happened.
Someone's watching us.
You are a handsome devil.
I volunteer to eat it!
Why do you tease me, so much?
I knew you could make up your mind.
Take the money and die.
We're going to need a lot of help.
I can't find my fly anywhere.
No one can ever know that I like Justin Beiber
Your cheeks have turned brown.
Dating is like making spaghetti...
You're cursed.
I'm trying to win.
I want you to be uncomplaining.
Take this for luck.
You angel!
I should ask for more money.
Eating is one of the great pleasures in life.
I never really lived.
I can offer you a kebab.
I heard laughter coming from the attic.
You should call your mother.
Don't get too close.
Don't be afraid. I just need you to go to sleep
This is the perfect time to be hysterical.
Please, remain silent.
The first thing to consider is the consequences.
Did you eat just now?
It's going to be okay
It wasn't your fault that the bus was late.
This room is haunted.
If you're ready, we'll get started.
Get ready to run.
A girl needs her grandfather.
I've reported it to the President.
I could never want you.
I'm the best historian who ever lived.
No one can ever know that I am alive.
I love winter in Brazil.
Find some proof that he lied to you.
I know where you were.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a jumper.
This is a fine ship
She was unconscious when I found her.
My life is over.
Open the door.
I see you have done this before.
Friendship is like a beach...
We need to go.
I want you to document my trip to Germany.
Can I make a kite?
It's not heavy.
I'm a god.
Are you nuts? We're not together!
How dare you look down your nose at me!
You love me.
You said you didn't see your mother at all that day.
I am going to the wedding.
You're going to need a shovel.
You are a godsend.
This is the only thing that's made the last five minutes possible.
If you don't want it, can I have it?
We're special.
I volunteer myself!
No one can ever know that you can dance.
Who left a spoon in the basement?
I have the card.
Your lips have turned red.
In the midst of life we are in death.
I just want a corkscrew. What's wrong with that?
You're going to pay!
I heard weeping coming from the bathroom.
We're going to need a lot of money.
You monster!
I want that chimpanzee out of my room!
I feel courageous.
I guess you have read the stories about my father?
Leave it until morning.
I'll get ready.
Take this with water.
I'm the best lumberjack on this planet
Am I allowed to go, or not?
I want you to stop tricking me.
Don't upset your father, not now.
Go and live with your uncle, then! See if I care.
You are my inspiration.
When the door opens, remain calm.
She couldn't have arrived at a worse time.
Delivery!
Did you get lucky today?
Hey, watch me smile.
I want you to stop me.
Okay. Just do what I do.
I have powers.
You are the most generous person I have ever met.
When I was little, I wanted to be a hobgoblin.
I want you to be determined.
Open wide and say 'Ah'.
Boop-Oop-a-Doop.
Give me the spatula.
It has to work
Give me one good reason why I should wear socks.
It's not going to fit.
You are so mean to me.
No one can ever know that I like you
Please, give me that.
Why do you hate me, so much?
This is the only thing that's made the last five minutes bearable
Give it here.
If you're sure, we'll get started.
Are you nuts? We're not friends!
We need to make better decisions.
This is a fine mess
I can offer you a lifetime of happiness.
I can offer you a bagel.
You're a ghost.
Finding a job is like taking out the garbage...
Don't be scared. I just need you to wait
I feel maternal.
What will you do, now that you've completed the mission?
It wasn't my fault that the movie sucked.
I just want a mouse. What's wrong with that?
I have the scroll.
Someone's in here.
A girl needs her father.
I can't find my wine anywhere.
I love spring in England.
I'll watch.
Cooking is all I can manage now.
You never smile.
If you don't want it, give it to someone who does.
You lost it.
I want that raccoon out of my life!
The first thing to consider is how to get away with it.
You crashed the car on purpose.
This room is shrinking.
Get ready for this.
Did you eat while I was away?
I see you came prepared.
It's time to brush your teeth.
I want you to clean up after me.
Who left a teddy bear in the basement?
There's many a slip 'twixt cup and lip.
We've only got one bullet.
Don't upset your boss, not now.
Let's drink
I want you.
Sweetheart, it's so shiny.
We are whimsical.
I've reported it to Interpol.
We're going to need a tax collector.
This is the perfect time to be happy.
It's giving me grief.
You are so kind to me.
I never wanted to die.
Please, give up while you can.
I'm going to need a hammer.
You're going to need a lot of snacks.
I want you to stop looking at me.
You should ask for more money.
No one can ever know that I like skipping
I can offer you a latte.
I can offer you a job.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a hat.
You are my reason for living.
We're ghosts.
Are you nuts? We're not ready!
I'm the greatest locksmith on this planet
Don't be scared. I just need you to come with me
Good night!
I have the need, the need for speed.
I love autumn in Australia.
Open the window.
This looks odd.
You are not my mother.
I guess you have seen the stories about my mother?
Stop, in the name of all things holy.
Your lips have turned stripey.
If you don't want it, throw it away.
It's your fault that we ran out of bread.
No one can ever know that you can sing.
You are the most beautiful person I have ever met.
You are an idiot.
I bet you know why I'm tired.
Brevity is the soul of wit.
Ha-cha-cha.
I feel at ease.
You will always want me.
Let's watch the game
Just try not to cry
I want you to be delighted.
Buying a house is like making toast...
A boy needs love.
Laughing is not as easy as it looks.
I know math.
Am I under arrest, or not?
Okay. Just stay calm and look straight ahead.
We're going to need a chef.
We need to make a plan.
Someone's listening.
Don't wait to be asked.
This is the worst time to be somewhere else.
Show me the umbrella.
When the party starts, put on your clothes.
It's time to go.
You are my love.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a dress.
Don't be afraid. I just need you to come with me
I want you to stop tickling me.
You should protect your father.
Are you crazy? We're not alone!
Good grief!
Find some proof that I lied to you.
I have time.
Don't upset your mother, not now.
I heard weeping coming from the basement.
This is a stick up.
I can't find my sandwich anywhere.
The first thing to consider is the cost.
I'm going to need a can opener.
I need to tell you about the funeral.
You are beautiful.
Go and live with your aunt, then! See if I care.
I want that chicken out of my room!
Hi De Hi De Hi De Hi.
I knew you wouldn't be able to turn things around.
I can offer you an ale.
When I was little, I wanted to be a bishop.
Be safe!
I could never hate you.
We're going to need a lot of wood.
I'm a ghost.
I guess you have seen the stories about my work?
I'm the best broker on this planet
Give me one good reason why I should wear pants.
Your eyes have turned brown.
Open the curtains.
If you're hungry, we'll get started.
It's your fault that the wedding was cancelled.
You are so good to me.
Did you drink 8 glasses of water just now?
Please, tell me.
What will you do, now that you've won the lottery?
Dare to dream
You said you didn't see your doctor at all that day.
I just want a saw. What's wrong with that?
Am I dead, or not?
Let's dance
You are not my son.
I feel stupid.
Laughing is good for the soul.
A girl needs discipline.
He couldn't have died at a worse time.
No one can ever know that I was here.
Are you nuts? We're not 'lucky'!
Why do you love me, so much?
Don't be afraid. I just need you to think
I want you to be elegant.
Can I make informed decisions?
Someone's locked the door.
No one can ever know how much this hurts.
Leave it to the professionals.
You're going down!
I want you to stop lying to me.
I've reported it to the press.
This looks nice.
I am going to Easter.
It wasn't your fault that the plane was late.
When I was little, I wanted to be a ghost.
Find some proof that she deceived you.
Throw me the kebab.
Your nose has turned orange.
Did you drink 8 glasses of water at work?
Take the drink and leave.
I heard laughter coming from the waiting room.
I hate you.
Don't upset your brother, not now.
It's your fault that your heart got broken.
It's the singer not the song.
I'll help.
You should ask your father.
You will always despise me.
This is the only thing that's made the last two years possible.
We've only got one option.
You are crazy.
Your ears have turned blue.
Hey, watch me with your eyes.
I want that dolphin out of my house!
Cooking is one of the great pleasures in life.
My life is cursed.
Don't fool around.
Who left a licorice twist in the kitchen?
I want you to cancel my trip to England.
Okay. Just follow my lead.
I'm going to need a fork.
Are you kidding me? We're not alone!
I'm the greatest innkeeper who ever lived.
Love is like a lake...
When the party starts, start singing.
I'm cursed.
My love, it's so shiny.
I just want a room. What's wrong with that?
This is the right time to be angry.
I love summer in Germany.
I'm going to need a librarian.
I need to tell you about Tuesday.
How dare you look at me!
When I was little, I wanted to be a warlock.
I want you to be logical.
You devil!
Someone's coming this way.
Hand me the fishcake.
Don't be scared. I just need you to go to sleep
It's time to go to bed.
I want you to kiss me.
I can offer you a bread-stick.
Your tongue has turned stripey.
I feel hesitant.
It's your fault that we ran out of money.
Find some proof that I fooled you.
Finding a job is like opening a gift...
This is the only thing that's made the last two days bearable
Let's get it
We need to play.
I want that goose out of my life!
I have to tell you about the bagel.
Can I make money?
We're the same person.
I can offer you a good price.
I can't find my bratwurst anywhere.
Don't just stand there.
You are not my daughter.
I should start a business.
Be better!
Hey, watch me move.
We're going to need a lot of concrete.
I'm magnificent.
Get ready to dance.
I'm trying to save you.
I just want a spring-roll. What's wrong with that?
She couldn't have died at a worse time.
Darling, it's dead.
You will always hate me.
I heard weeping coming from the control room.
We're going to need a knife.
It's giving me hope.
This room is unstable.
I feel outrageous.
Find some proof that they deceived you.
Take the drink and die.
You need it.
I knew you wouldn't be able to open it.
It's your fault that the lights went out.
Reading is good for the soul.
I am going to Thanksgiving.
We are emotional.
Don't be afraid. I just need you to hold your breath
I have to tell you about Sunday.
I volunteer as tribute!
You are the best person I have ever met.
Please, don't move.
Can I make art?
You are not my conscience.
I want that hamster out of my car!
You are my everything.
Death is like a canvas...
You said you didn't see your sister at all that day.
I despise you.
My life means nothing.
I'll be here, if you need me.
You're under arrest!
The first thing to consider is safety.
I have lost the will to live.
Take this and pray.
I'm the only sleuth on this planet
What will you do, now that you've found your passion?
We're going to need a can opener.
It's not right.
Sweetheart, it's so expensive.
The best-laid plans go astray.
Are you kidding me? We're not 'lucky'!
You despise me.
I heard a noise coming from the wardrobe.
Your lips have turned purple.
When the party starts, hide.
When I was little, I wanted to be a dragon.
It was my fault that the boat floated away.
I am going to Christmas.
Please, be careful.
I need to tell you about the the fort.
I want you to be poor.
Your face has turned stripey.
I love fall in Australia.
I want you to cancel my trip to China.
This is the perfect time to be here.
Find some proof that they fooled you.
I never killed anyone.
I have the will.
I am colorful.
You said you didn't see your doctor at all today.
Your hopes are like marshmallows...
You're never going to get away with this!
I'm going to need a butcher.
You broke the vase on purpose.
You're magnificent.
I should hide.
I knew you wouldn't be able to live like this.
I want you to stop questioning me.
This is the only thing that's made the last three months possible.
Go and live with your mother, then! See if I care.
Stop, in the name of the law.
The first thing to consider is who's paying.
Give me the spoon.
You dropped it.
We're going to need a screwdriver.
Gardening is good for the soul.
Leave it here.
I guess you have read the stories about my mother?
I just want a sandwich. What's wrong with that?
Don't upset your grandfather, not now.
A cat has nine lives.
A girl needs her own room.
No one can ever know how we did it.
Put it here.
No one can ever know that I escaped.
Who left a Budweiser in the cell?
I want that wolf out of my life!
It was my fault that the wig came off.
Can I make it work?
I'm trying to help.
I'm the only stonecutter on this planet
I bet you know why I'm worried.
Thoughts are like salmon swimming upstream...
This is the perfect time to be somewhere else.
I want you to listen to me.
I'm going to need a writer.
I know more than you realise.
You're alone in the universe.
I'll sit on it.
You need me.
Similes
Comparison of two things, with an ellipsis. Complete the simile by explaining how the two things are alike.
5102050100500More coming soon! Make suggestions on the Improbot Facebook page.