The Improbot app for Android is now available -- Improbot on Google Play.
Random Dialogue (x 500)
Someone's watching us.
Hey, watch me move.
You are a godsend.
Why do you hate me, so much?
Be yourself!
I can't find my candy-bar anywhere.
You're going to need an artist.
When I was little, I wanted to be an elf.
You're a god.
You're crazy!
Give me one good reason why I should wear an apron.
I knew you wouldn't be able to turn things around.
I've reported it to the press.
I want you to stop tickling me.
You are so kind to me.
No one can ever know that I like to sing
Fears are like salmon swimming upstream...
This room is haunted.
I'm the greatest herald on this planet
I bet you know why I'm drinking again.
You never have time for me.
I should start a business.
Good morning!
I never wanted this.
How dare you smile at me!
Okay. Just follow my lead.
Take this for luck.
Don't fool around.
It wasn't my fault that you slipped in the driveway.
I could never want you.
I'm alone in the universe.
We're the same person.
You found it.
Darling, it's beautiful.
He was unconscious when I found him.
Don't blow your own trumpet.
I want that duck out of my room!
You said you didn't see your doctor at all yesterday.
I feel frustrated.
Let's watch the game
You are the most hideous person I have ever met.
Getting married is like making toast...
You could never love me.
This is the only thing that's made the last two years bearable
It's your fault that the show was ruined.
Delivery!
I just want a slice of pizza. What's wrong with that?
I want you to cancel my trip to France.
I want you to look at me.
We need to make a plan.
Who left an ale in the chapel?
Are you crazy? We're not invincible!
It's time to rip off the bandaid.
Find some proof that he fooled you.
You are my love.
Get ready to die.
Show me the bike.
Go and live with your father, then! See if I care.
We've only got one bullet.
This is the right time to be happy.
I heard a noise coming from the cell.
I volunteer myself!
My life means nothing.
I can offer you a wine.
You never smile.
We're going to need a wrench.
Did you drink 8 glasses of water last night?
Leave it until morning.
Throw it here.
I have lost the will to live.
Knitting is one of the great pleasures in life.
You should ask your mother.
Open sesame.
You are an idiot.
Sorry, I have to take this.
No one can ever know that I like to dance
Give me one good reason why I should wear a hat.
I bet you know why I'm smiling.
This looks peculiar.
Give me one good reason why I should wear socks.
Okay. Just do what I do.
We're crazy.
This room is bugged.
It's giving me grief.
Maybe no one will notice
Take the piano and leave.
Please, stop smoking.
It's not for sale.
We're going to need a lot of concrete.
You're a ghost.
Let's dance
When the party starts, remain calm.
Whoop-whoop.
You devil!
We're gods.
I feel hopeful.
I want that zebra out of my life!
I want to tell you about the control room.
We're going to need a drummer.
I am terrified.
What will you do, now that you've come home?
I heard a creaking sound coming from the dining room.
I want you to stop blaming me.
You said you didn't see your wife at all that day.
No one can ever know that I was here.
It's time to go.
No one can ever know how we did it.
You are not my favourite.
How dare you look down your nose at me!
It's your fault that the icecream melted.
Your tongue has turned pink.
How much courage do you have?
Stop, in the name of the law.
Take this and pray.
We need to fight.
Give me the carrot.
I volunteer to eat it!
I just want an icecream. What's wrong with that?
You crashed the car on purpose.
I have a secret.
Finding a job is like doing housework...
I could never need you.
Don't upset your boss, not now.
You're going to pay!
My life is a mystery.
I see you have done this before.
Your ears have turned black.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a necklace.
Am I under arrest, or not?
You are the funniest person I have ever met.
I am going to Easter.
You're going to need a can opener.
I'm cursed.
Go and live with your aunt, then! See if I care.
You should protect your mother.
This room is unstable.
Did you eat just now?
When the curtain goes up, whistle like a bird.
I know what happened.
Find some proof that he tricked you.
This is a fine ship
What will you do, now that you've found a job?
A girl needs love.
You can do this
Hopes are like spaghetti...
Hey, watch me smile.
I'm trying to leave.
Give it here.
Please, lie down.
Someone's in here.
He couldn't have arrived at a worse time.
You never say what you're thinking.
The first thing to consider is how to get away with it.
You should vote.
I want you to be receptive.
I can't find my sandwich anywhere.
I heard laughter coming from the wardrobe.
We need to play.
This is the only thing that's made the last three months possible.
It's your fault that the dinner got burnt.
I am satisfied.
Laughing is good for the soul.
I'll help.
Give me one good reason why I should wear swimmers.
When I was little, I wanted to be a burglar.
I can offer you an egg nog.
I want that fly out of my car!
This is the worst time to be amused.
You broke the vase on purpose.
You are a thief.
I volunteer to go!
You could never need me.
I can offer you a chance to redeem yourself.
I love winter in China.
I bet you know why I'm here.
I'm the worst chef who ever lived.
Throw me the ukulele.
Why do you love me, so much?
I have needs.
My life is cursed.
I guess you have seen the stories about my uncle?
I see you smiling.
Good luck!
You should write to your father.
Among the blind, the one-eyed man is king.
He couldn't have died at a worse time.
I want to tell you about the mobster.
You are not my conscience.
Hey, watch me dance.
Can I make laughter?
Leave it alone.
Your pleasure is like a book...
It's time to make lunch.
This is a day to remember
Give me one good reason why I should wear a dress.
You are the most mysterious person I have ever met.
I never hurt anybody.
Get ready, or get out.
I have the card.
When the curtain goes up, remain calm.
No one can ever know how much this hurts.
Be careful!
Cooking is not as easy as it looks.
You're going to need a saw.
You are so mean to me.
It's not dead.
Are you pulling my leg? We're not 'lucky'!
I want you to document my trip to Canada.
Your face has turned red.
Let's get it
When I was little, I wanted to be a chief of police.
Dating is like opening a window...
Your lips have turned brown.
Open the door.
If you're ready, we'll get started.
I'm going to need a watchmaker.
No one can ever know that I can dance.
You dropped it.
No one can ever know that I like you
Patience is a virtue
Please, be careful.
This looks great.
I can offer you a soda.
Every man for himself, and the Devil take the hindmost.
I volunteer as tribute!
It was your fault that the show was cancelled.
I have to tell you about the armory.
I'll get ready.
I'm going to need a lot of nails.
If you don't want it, throw it away.
The first thing to consider is the cost.
I just want a carrot. What's wrong with that?
I heard weeping coming from the lounge room.
You are a liar.
You are not my son.
My life matters.
I need to tell you about Friday.
You should ask your father.
Don't upset your grandmother, not now.
I see you came prepared.
Leave it here.
I guess you have seen the stories about my work?
Who left a guitar in the guest room?
I love summer in America.
Find some proof that they tricked you.
I'm the only butcher who ever lived.
You fascinate me.
My love, it's dead.
I want you to clean up after me.
Can I make a plan?
I want that whale out of my car!
I feel competitive.
Don't be scared. I just need you to listen
We're weird.
A boy needs money.
I can offer you a job.
I should quit.
Hand me the doll.
Let's play
I want you to be modest.
It's time to go to bed.
If you're hungry, we'll get started.
She couldn't have died at a worse time.
Your ears have turned red.
You monster!
I'm going to need a fork.
Did you drink 8 glasses of water yesterday?
You are so nice to me.
We're going to need a lot of wood.
You're never going to get away with this!
The best defence is a good offence.
Take the money and die.
I want you to stop loving me.
Are you crazy? We're not alone!
I'm going to need a bandit.
I never killed anyone.
I am going to the grand opening.
It's not open.
Please, don't move.
You never do what I want.
She was unconscious when I found her.
You made me cry on purpose.
Someone's listening.
No one can ever know that I am alive.
You should make peace with your mother.
If you don't want it, put it back.
You won't find it.
Dare to dream
I bet you know why I'm happy.
I have the knife.
You are the oddest person I have ever met.
It's giving me an error message.
You are scared.
Your face has turned stripey.
I feel forgetful.
I want that dolphin out of my life!
Your ego is like a forest...
I want you to kill me.
This is the only thing that's made the last four weeks possible.
This is the right time to be hysterical.
I guess you have seen the stories about my brother?
Be safe!
I have faith.
It wasn't your fault that we ran out of money.
Good night!
We need to stop.
Throw me the chair.
Open it here.
You are my favourite.
Don't upset your brother, not now.
Don't wait to be asked.
Why do you tease me, so much?
This looks familiar.
I'm going to need a lot of masking tape.
I want you to stop looking at me.
Are you nuts? We're not together!
I will always despise you.
I'm crazy.
You're going to need a yodeler.
When the door opens, make a run for it.
Ha-cha-cha.
You can't teach an old dog new tricks.
Find some proof that she deceived you.
If you're sure, we'll get started.
I can't find my tropical juice anywhere.
Don't be afraid. I just need you to stop
A boy needs a job.
She couldn't have arrived at a worse time.
I'm the greatest technician on this planet
Let's drink
Give me one good reason why I should wear trousers.
You are the most generous person I have ever met.
I want you to listen to me.
No one will ever know
Am I dead, or not?
Go and live with your mother, then! See if I care.
I'm trying to help.
I want you to be frivolous.
I want that moose out of my car!
This is a stick up.
I know who you are.
Dreams are like spaghetti...
Get ready to dance.
No one can ever know that I like Justin Beiber
You should listen to your father.
Having a child is like making cupcakes...
Who left a Gatorade in the lobby?
Hand me the hot dog.
I'll wait here.
You need me.
Please, stay where you are.
It's your fault that the boat floated away.
Can I make a cake?
You said you didn't see your sister at all yesterday.
Take the drink and die.
I am going to the wedding.
You're really something!
Take this with water.
Plug it in here.
I'm a god.
This looks suspicious.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a t-shirt.
Are you crazy? We're not 'fine'!
I can offer you a lifetime of happiness.
You're no good.
It wasn't your fault that Grandma fell down the well.
I should buy a lottery ticket.
This room is shrinking.
I love summer in Spain.
Darling, it's delicious.
You are a hero.
I can't find my beaver anywhere.
Did you fart last night?
You're going to need a lot of wood.
What will you do, now that you've found God?
I'm going to need a spin doctor.
Your lips have turned stripey.
Sound the alarm!
Failing to plan, is planning to fail.
Dammit, who left a fork in the kitchen?
We're ghosts.
I see you every day.
Your nose has turned black.
You should find your father.
I'm trying to win.
Your opinion is like a beach...
I want that tortoise out of my room!
It's your fault that the dog died.
Stop, in the name of all things holy.
You said you didn't see your doctor at all this week.
When the bell rings, start singing.
I want you to document my trip to Japan.
How dare you look at me!
I will always love you.
You never call me.
I need to tell you about the funeral.
Don't ask any questions.
I can offer you a Guinness.
I'm the greatest pawnbroker who ever lived.
Open the bottle.
Knitting is all I can manage now.
I just want a flute. What's wrong with that?
When I was little, I wanted to be a goldsmith.
It was my fault that the icecream melted.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a jacket.
You are my teacher.
You're crazy.
I have the gun.
I am going to Christmas.
I guess you have heard the stories about my brother?
Did you drink 8 glasses of water just now?
This is the only thing that's made the last five years possible.
I know where you were.
It's not in.
I can't find my kite anywhere.
I love winter in Spain.
My love, it's so juicy.
Falling in love is like tidying your room...
Give me one good reason why I should wear shoes.
Your face has turned purple.
I'm trying to save you.
You angel!
I bet you know why I'm going.
I've reported it to the President.
This is the worst time to be hysterical.
Your hopes are like chocolate...
Are you kidding me? We're not 'fine'!
I feel tough.
Find some proof that she tricked you.
I have money.
You are naive.
I never wanted to die.
I see you know what to do.
It was your fault that your heart got broken.
Don't be scared. I just need you to go to sleep
You're going to need a screwdriver.
You are a handsome devil.
I'm the only shaman who ever lived.
I want you to be flexible.
Put it here.
Stop, in the name of love.
He couldn't have left at a worse time.
When I was little, I wanted to be a werewolf.
Show me the croissant.
Be better!
I want you to stop following me.
Take the drink and leave.
You said you didn't see your sister at all this week.
Time is like an ocean...
I just want a spaceship. What's wrong with that?
Don't put all your eggs in one basket.
I love you.
Eating is all I can manage now.
You're going to need a lot of food.
I love summer in Australia.
This is the only thing that's made the last two days bearable
We're special.
Good grief!
Sorry, I can't do this any more.
Please, tell me.
Your lips have turned white.
Who left a teddy bear in the library?
I can offer you a fishcake.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a suit.
I want you to read to me.
This looks wrong.
You are not my father.
Don't be afraid. I just need you to hold your breath
I want that dolphin out of my house!
The first thing to consider is safety.
I have to tell you about the gardener.
Find some proof that I fooled you.
I know more than you realise.
It's almost over
Sweetheart, it's so juicy.
You said you didn't see your father at all yesterday.
I'm the worst lighthouse-keeper who ever lived.
It's time to pack your bags.
We're going to need a model.
Wealth is like a piano...
It's giving me hope.
This is the right time to be angry.
I want you to stop questioning me.
You're cursed.
I could never hate you.
You are a genius.
No one can ever know that I can sing.
I want you to cancel my trip to Spain.
It's not appropriate.
Dying is like drinking a bottle of whiskey...
We should start a business.
You are the most beautiful person I have ever met.
No one can ever know why I'm leaving.
I just want a can opener. What's wrong with that?
I have 20-20 vision.
I am going to the funeral.
It's your fault that we ran out of bread.
Show me the bagel.
Your lips have turned orange.
I want to tell you about Monday.
Similes
Comparison of two things, with an ellipsis. Complete the simile by explaining how the two things are alike.
5102050100500More coming soon! Make suggestions on the Improbot Facebook page.