The Improbot app for Android is now available -- Improbot on Google Play.
Random Dialogue (x 500)
I want you to stop laughing at me.
I'm a ghost.
If you're ready, we'll get started.
Dare to dream
This room is haunted.
The first thing to consider is how to get away with it.
This is the worst time to be angry.
Did you fart last night?
You are my inspiration.
This looks great.
I can offer you a good price.
Who left a carrot in the lobby?
He was unconscious when I found him.
Don't upset your father, not now.
It's time to make lunch.
Laughing is not as easy as it looks.
It's not tight enough.
What will you do, now that you've found a job?
I want you to join me on my trip to Germany.
We need to unite.
Let's watch the game
I volunteer myself!
We've only got one life.
You are an artist.
Throw me the teddy bear.
Be safe!
Genius is one percent inspiration, ninety-nine percent perspiration.
This is the only thing that's made the last two minutes possible.
I will always hate you.
You're special.
No one can ever know why I'm leaving.
Life is like a forest...
When the curtain goes up, put on your clothes.
I want you to cook for me.
Whoop-whoop.
I guess you have seen the stories about my sister?
I have lost the will to live.
I'm going to need a gladiator.
I just want a Gatorade. What's wrong with that?
I want you to be desolate.
Good morning!
You devil!
Delivery!
You want it.
Are you kidding me? We're not 'lucky'!
I have to tell you about Sunday.
I want that shark out of my life!
I'll get it.
I'm trying to care.
He couldn't have died at a worse time.
Please, stop smoking.
I'm going to need a lot of food.
I know what happened.
Why do you hate me, so much?
You're really something!
I can offer you an icecream.
Find some proof that I tricked you.
You never take me seriously.
Stop, in the name of all things holy.
You should vote.
We're gods.
It wasn't my fault that the wedding was cancelled.
Can I make a treehouse?
I bet you know why I'm broke.
Sweetheart, it's delicious.
No one can ever know that you survived.
How dare you smile at me!
I love summer in Hong Kong.
My life matters.
Get ready, or get out.
Don't upset your grandfather, not now.
You broke the vase on purpose.
Leave it here.
Sorry, I have to take this.
A boy needs his friends.
We need to play.
It's not alive.
Who left a crab in the basement?
I'm the worst garbage collector on this planet
This is a day to remember
I'm alone in the universe.
Did you enjoy yourself this morning?
I want you to cancel my trip to Spain.
Fears are like chocolate...
It's your fault that the movie sucked.
I knew you could live like this.
Take the drink and die.
You said you didn't see your father at all this week.
Show me the shovel.
I have 20-20 vision.
It's time to pack your bags.
I am going to the wedding.
I've reported it to Interpol.
I see you every day.
I'm going to need a spoon.
I can offer you a lifetime of happiness.
No one can ever know that I was here.
Okay. Just do what I do.
I want you to stop me.
You are so mean to me.
I want you to stop looking at me.
Are you nuts? We're not 'lucky'!
Good luck!
I heard a noise coming from the chapel.
When I was little, I wanted to be a hydra.
I guess you have heard the stories about my mother?
The first thing to consider is the cost.
I'm trying to open it.
I'll sit on it.
I feel dirty.
I should hide.
Don't be scared. I just need you to think
You are the loneliest person I have ever met.
I can offer you a muffin.
I have to tell you about the Red Bull.
I want that chimpanzee out of my life!
It has to work
Your redemption is like a lake...
I am old-fashioned.
Reading is not as easy as it looks.
I want you to be obedient.
We're alone in the universe.
From the sublime to the ridiculous is only one step.
You're coming with me!
You should make peace with your mother.
She couldn't have died at a worse time.
We're the same person.
I never killed anyone.
It's not going to fit.
Can I make art?
Give me one good reason why I should wear trousers.
If you don't want it, put it back.
Don't upset your boss, not now.
Find some proof that I fooled you.
Your ears have turned blue.
I'm going to need a gravedigger.
I have needs.
Get ready to dance.
You're going to need a knife.
This is the worst time to be amused.
We've only got one of these.
It's your fault that the show was cancelled.
I knew you wouldn't be able to survive.
Go and live with your father, then! See if I care.
Show me the bike.
You're a ghost.
Did you drink 8 glasses of water last night?
Take the money and leave.
Learning is like doing housework...
I am going to the party.
You are so kind to me.
I want you to document my trip to America.
Let's drink
I can't find my kite anywhere.
We're crazy.
Show no mercy
I guess you have seen the stories about my uncle?
This looks familiar.
You fascinate me.
You're going to need a lot of leaves.
I want you to be effeminate.
Be yourself!
When I was little, I wanted to be a mason.
You should quit.
This is the only thing that's made the last three weeks bearable
I want you to look at me.
I'm the best sage who ever lived.
I bet you know why I'm worried.
I need to tell you about Sunday.
Don't be afraid. I just need you to stop
Sweetheart, it's dead.
Hey, watch me smile.
Cooking is one of the great pleasures in life.
I volunteer as tribute!
A girl needs confidence.
I could never love you.
No one can ever know that you killed him.
I love fall in Canada.
You should disown your father.
I'll open it.
What will you do, now that you've eaten?
I heard a creaking sound coming from the bathroom.
I'm going to need a reporter.
If you don't want it, can I have it?
You burned it on purpose.
Hi De Hi De Hi De Hi.
It's giving me a headache.
You said you didn't see your father at all that day.
The first thing to consider is who's paying.
Someone's locked the door.
You are my favourite.
Running for office is like making toast...
No one will ever know
Are you nuts? We're not together!
Why do you tease me, so much?
Don't get too close.
Put it here.
I have the poem.
Am I under arrest, or not?
Did you drink 8 glasses of water while I was away?
It's your fault that the icecream melted.
Get ready for this.
My life is cursed.
If you're sure, we'll get started.
You are generous.
I can offer you a smoothie.
Give me the kebab.
No one can ever know what we did.
You are not my conscience.
I feel threatened.
I can't find my submarine anywhere.
She was unconscious when I found her.
It's not right.
I want you to betray me.
Sound the alarm!
I want you to be hedonistic.
Can I make a wish?
You angel!
Go and live with your sister, then! See if I care.
I could never need you.
We're insignificant.
You dropped it.
Leave it to the professionals.
I never listened.
When I was little, I wanted to be a hobgoblin.
We need to make better decisions.
You crashed the car on purpose.
You are the oddest person I have ever met.
Take this and pray.
You're going to need a lot of nails.
I have to tell you about Thursday.
Sweetheart, it's so juicy.
Hey, watch me leave.
You are so nice to me.
I'm the greatest flight attendant who ever lived.
Good night!
I want you to cancel my trip to England.
Let the buyer beware.
My life is over.
Someone's in here.
I'm a god.
Dammit, who left an ale in the kitchen?
Just breathe
I love autumn in Japan.
You despise me.
Give me one good reason why I should wear a t-shirt.
It's time to brush your teeth.
I have faith.
I heard weeping coming from the control room.
You should ask your mother.
You're under arrest!
No one can ever know that I like to sing
Open the bottle.
This is the only thing that's made the last four minutes bearable
Let's play
I'm insignificant.
Don't be scared. I just need you to come with me
You are an inspiration.
I am complacent.
Are you pulling my leg? We're not alone!
I never really lived.
It's not open.
I can't find my Bud Light anywhere.
I will always despise you.
I want you to be neat.
Leave it outside.
I see you smiling.
Did you fart today?
I feel cold.
I knew you could see it through.
I want that hippopotamus out of my house!
Ha-cha-cha.
I guess you have heard the stories about my father?
Go and live with your brother, then! See if I care.
Throw me the chair.
What will you do, now that you've got your licence?
Please, stop shouting.
I'm the best monk who ever lived.
This is the perfect time to be alone.
Darling, it's beautiful.
I know the future.
I've reported it to the police.
We're going to need a lot of buttons.
I want to tell you about Wednesday.
Drop it here.
It wasn't my fault that we ran out of eggs.
This is a stick up.
More haste, less speed.
You need it.
Don't wait to be asked.
A boy needs money.
I volunteer to go!
I should pay the bill.
It's giving me hope.
The first thing to consider is the consequences.
If you don't want it, throw it away.
My life means nothing.
We've only got one option.
Hey, watch me dance.
This looks odd.
You never smile.
I bet you know why I'm alone.
This room is bugged.
When I was little, I wanted to be a dwarf.
Dancing is not as easy as it looks.
Did you eat this morning?
Your forgiveness is like a book...
I want you to be incapable.
Take the money and die.
I feel wonderful.
Your ears have turned green.
I knew you wouldn't be able to turn things around.
Let's go
This is the only thing that's made the last two weeks bearable
I love winter in Ireland.
You're going to need a wrench.
Can I make a plan?
We're going to need an air traffic controller.
Bad news travels fast.
We need to open it.
I could never want you.
I am appalled.
A boy needs his father.
I want you to stop lying to me.
You are the most interesting person I have ever met.
I heard weeping coming from the dining room.
What will you do, now that you've won the lottery?
I just want a cup. What's wrong with that?
You are a genius.
Take this for luck.
Fears are like spaghetti...
Open it here.
No one can ever know that you can fly.
I want you to marry me.
You should think about this.
It's your fault that Grandma fell down the stairs.
It was my fault that the lights went out.
I know more than you realise.
This room is unstable.
Be better!
How dare you laugh at me!
This looks bad.
You said you didn't see your husband at all yesterday.
Don't upset your sister, not now.
We're weird.
I want you to be astigmatic.
Get ready to laugh.
We're ghosts.
I'm the only teacher on this planet
Can I make fudge?
You are my reason for living.
You will always fascinate me.
I have the time.
You're going to need an interior designer.
Let's eat
Give me the ukulele.
I've reported it to mother.
Don't ask any questions.
I love summer in Antarctica.
I want to tell you about the werewolf.
Who left a spatula in the lobby?
I guess you have read the stories about my brother?
When I was little, I wanted to be a sasquatch.
This is the right time to be somewhere else.
I am small-thinking.
Did you fart this morning?
When the door opens, remain calm.
I never hurt anybody.
It's not mine.
I feel indecisive.
I can offer you an ale.
Take the piano and die.
Are you kidding me? We're not friends!
Good grief!
This is a fine ship
Hey, watch me with your eyes.
It's your fault that you slipped in the shower.
You're never going to get away with this!
I know math.
If you're done, we'll get started.
Find some proof that she betrayed you.
The first thing to consider is safety.
My love, it's so expensive.
You said you didn't see your husband at all that day.
You're magnificent.
Plug it in here.
Give me one good reason why I should wear overalls.
Can I make a kite?
A boy needs his mother.
You are a poet.
I want to tell you about Monday.
I've reported it to the President.
I have the card.
Why do you love me, so much?
Open the door.
Give me the saw.
I just want a shovel. What's wrong with that?
I want that owl out of my room!
I am excitable.
I can offer you a bratwurst.
Hopes are like chocolate...
Did you eat yesterday?
Your eyes have turned orange.
I knew you wouldn't be able to open it.
We need to stay.
This is the only thing that's made the last four days bearable
I can't find my pickle anywhere.
We should be as quiet as a mouse.
I love you.
You never do what I want.
Please, don't move.
I want you to stop believing in me.
I'm going to need a lot of wine.
Laughing is good for the soul.
No one can ever know that I am alive.
Finding a job is like writing a to do list...
You won't find it.
You're cursed.
This is the perfect time to be happy.
I want you to cancel my trip to Australia.
Someone's having a bad day.
I'm going to need a can opener.
When the party starts, hide.
I'm trying to tie my laces.
Okay. Just follow my lead.
I'm the worst programmer on this planet
Take the money and go.
Throw it here.
Who left a rum and coke in the armory?
Everyone wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to die.
I'm going to need a cameraman.
Your tongue has turned green.
Get ready to run.
Don't upset your grandmother, not now.
Find some proof that they betrayed you.
No one can ever know that you escaped.
You are the best person I have ever met.
We've only got one chance.
You are not my mother.
This looks peculiar.
I heard laughter coming from the kitchen.
I need to tell you about the pastor.
Don't be scared. I just need you to close your eyes.
When I was little, I wanted to be a sea monster.
Can I make sandwiches?
You monster!
I want you to love me.
Thoughts are like marshmallows...
I feel sure.
You are a handsome devil.
Give me one good reason why I should wear gloves.
You never say what you're thinking.
You're lucky.
No one can ever know that I like to dance
Are you crazy? We're not friends!
Stop, in the name of the law.
It wasn't your fault that we ran out of bananas.
I can offer you a chance to redeem yourself.
Sorry, is all that I can say.
Leave it until morning.
This is the only thing that's made the last five years possible.
I want that turtle out of my house!
We're going to need a drummer.
I want you to be confused.
Am I allowed to go, or not?
We are sore.
Knitting is not as easy as it looks.
All that glitters is not gold.
If you don't want it, give it to someone who does.
Please, be careful.
I'm the best spy on this planet
I have the knife.
We need to stop.
It's your fault that the train was late.
Open the window.
I want to tell you about the chardonnay.
It's time to go.
Can I make lunch?
I heard a noise coming from the barn.
You are the most hideous person I have ever met.
I want you to stop blaming me.
You hate me.
We should hide.
This is a fine mess
Who left a hippopotamus in the dining room?
Don't take 'no' for an answer.
Give me one good reason why I should wear an apron.
I despise you.
Your lips have turned grey.
It wasn't your fault that the money disappeared.
It's not dead.
A girl needs her mother.
When the door opens, put on your clothes.
Death is like a beautiful melody...
I'll wait here.
I want you to help me.
You're crazy!
You found it.
I want to tell you about the grand opening.
Did you fart while I was away?
Similes
Comparison of two things, with an ellipsis. Complete the simile by explaining how the two things are alike.
5102050100500More coming soon! Make suggestions on the Improbot Facebook page.